Wilson

The reasoning for this post?? The hormones have been set off yet once again and I'm not sure if "goose frraaaba" is really going to cut it this time. I am sure most of you have heard about my annoying as f*** neighbor. But for those of you who don't, here are some stories I don't think I have ever shared with the blog world.

A couple days ago: Trav went to get the weed whipper wacker out of the shed. (OUR shed that is now bolted shut because of the neighbor...along with OUR dog pin and OUR cars and OUR house) Anywho...NO weed whipper wacker to be found. Dad wasn't too happy. He faaareaked. We just bought it at the end of last summer. It was top of the line, expensive, life time warrenty. We called my brothers, his dad, anyone who might have borrowed it. Nope...no one knew where it was. And you know...it was ironic because every single one of them said "did ya check with the neighbor?" Hmmmmm.....

So, guess who comes out weed whackin away with the EXACT SAME weed whipper wacker that we had yesterday?? Come on. Humor me. And guess..... THE FREAKIN NEIGHBOR!!!!! So what does my ever so polite husband do? Confronts him. Needless to say, the neighbor denied it. Swears up & down that it is his. Now what do we do?? Looks like I know what Luke & Logan will be getting Daddy for Father's Day this year. laskujrfwieojfkao;sifuwoijlkasdjfoaij!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Some oldies but goodies:

Neighbor walks over & asks if he can borrow our fire pit for his daughter's camp out. Of course! No problem! What are neighbors for? Trav walks out the next day & notices that the neighbor had dumped all the ashes (which had nails as well, from burning wood) right in the middle of our yard. Mmmmkay? Not cool. But whatever. Trav confronts him once again. Asks him to clean it up. The neighbor obliged. A week goes by...neighbor NEVER comes over to clean his mess up. Good ol Peco has a few drinks in him one night & decides to clean up the neighbors mess & chucked it over the fence to his side to get his point across. Usually I would scold my husband for such non sense. But this was different, I throughly enjoyed myself and I kept my mouth shut. Roscow's 1 Neighbor 0. The End: he didn't talk to us for a couple weeks. Ahhhhhhhh, heaven! But of course, that wouldn't last long.

OH! The fire pit reminds me. It's a metal fire pit..ok? METAL doesn't just fall apart. The freakin neighbor drives ONE strip through OUR grass with his riding lawn mower. Hits thet  firepit & crushes it. When we asked him about, he said oh ya...I noticed it just collapsed? WTF?!

One of my favorites!! It was last fall. Trav had just finished cleaning up the yard. Raked, burnt leaves...it looked lovely. (I should inform you that he yet once again had a few BLs in him). The neighbor comes out with his leaf blower --I mean who knows if it is really HIS leaf blower-- and proceeds to blow his leaves into OUR yard. What does my ever so bluntly, slightly buzzed husband do? He goes and gets his leaf blower out & proceeds to blow the neighbors leaves right back into his yard. It was simply ahhhhmazing. And halirious!!

WHY WHY WHY can't I have Wislon as my neighbor??

I would even take Mr. Wilson!!! ANYONE has to be better than mine. I would share a freakin duplex with my ex boyfriend and oh so lovely new wife over my neighbor anyday!! It's that bad folks. That bad...