Keeping Up With The Roscow's: Awakening.

i went to a gi specialist last tuesday

and without going into too much detail..

the dr told me that i have to lose weight.

huge awakening.

of course, i KNOW i need to lose weight.

but having a dr tell you that you HAVE to lose weight.

gut wrenching.

he stressed the fact that he needs me to eat CLEAN.

i have pages of foods that i can't eat.

including some clean foods.

so what is left? water.

i can drink and eat as much water as i want.

womp womp.

i went home that night and cried.

and cried. and cried.

pity party of one right here.

i was mad. sad. and everything in between.

wednesday morning.

i was going to be refreshed.

happy. determined. hopeful.

i was none of those.

i cried off and on all day.

i haven't had a day like that in a long time.

a day that i completely just felt sorry for myself.

hated being me.

but then my husband snapped me back into reality.

he's good at the whole..

no sugar coating things. it is what it is.

now do something about it.

and that's exactly what i did.

i haven't cried in a week.

i have ate under 1200 calories

of good, clean food every day.

i signed up for a kettle bell class 3 days a week.

i can do this.

i have to do this.

i have done this whole 'lifestyle change'/dieting thing before.

but for some reason i just feel that this time is different.

it used to be about me.

me looking good in that dress.

me wanting to feel pretty.

now. it's about my health.

something i can't take lightly when i have 3 little boys who need me.

heck, i need me.

somewhere between becoming a wife and mama..

i have lost myself.

and that is not ok.

i'm always the one building others up.

while i'm over here beating myself up.
hypocrite.

enough is enough.
especially enough of this whiny, poor me post.

onto the exciting part!!
ever hear about Meals by April??
if not. go check out her facebook page pronto.

exercising has never been the hard part for me.
it's the food part that always gets me.
and unfortunately for me...
exercising is 30% of the solution
and food is 70% of the solution.
april is going to be my lifesaver!

to keep it short & sweet.
a new menu comes out every week.
you choose which foods you want.
it can be one item or the whole menu.
payment & orders are due on saturdays.
pick up is on mondays.
when you get your food
it is all portioned out for you and comes with simple directions.

i got my first order last night.
and here is what i have had so far...